"My stories run up and bite me in the leg -- I respond by writing down everything that goes on during the bite. When I finish, the idea lets go and runs off." -- Ray Bradbury

"Writers must fortify themselves with pride and egotism as best they can. The process is analogous to using sandbags and loose timbers to protect a house against flood. Writers are vulnerable creatures like anyone else. For what do they have in reality? Not sandbags, not timbers. Just a flimsy reputation and a name." -- Brian Aldiss

Ep. 1.12: "Screamo vs. Polka"

How can two guys sit around and talk about absolutely nothing and pretend it's a whole lot of something?

Don't ask us -- we don't know either.

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Ep. 1.11: "It's in the Box"

Question: Should action figures be kept in the box, or should they be gotten out and played with? Obviously, we have a difference of opinion!

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"It has yet to be proven that intelligence has any survival value." -- Arthur C. Clarke

Ep. 1.10: "Not Expecting Much"

If you're going to be near the ocean, you either fish or look at bikini-clad babes. One of us will be lookin', and the other one will be fishin'.

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Ep. 1.9: "L'argent"

In the end, it's all about money.

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Ep. 1.8: "Can You Hear Me Know?"

Boys, and girls, the Word of the Day is Projection. Can YOU say projection?

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We Have Ours!

Got Tickets!

As of 7 p.m., 16 Sept. 2009, Robert and I are 100 percent registered to go to San Diego Comic-Con 2010!

Was there ever any doubt?

Ep. 1.7: "Snacktime!"

You can't go on a long trip without snacks -- lots of snacks -- and neither will we. I wouldn't be surprised if some cop in New Mexico or Arizona pulls us over to bum a snack off us. So I think it's best for us to have enough to share!

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"If we don't end war, war will end us." -- H.G. Wells

Ep. 1.6: "No costumes!"

One of the highlights of Comic-Con is the Masquerade Parade. Convention-goers dress up in their favorite geeky costumes, get up on stage and strut their stuff. Some have elaborate presentations, some are just too painful to watch. If I were to dress up in costume and strut, I would be in the "too painful to watch" category. SO, no costumes for us! Not this year! Possibly never! It's for the best!

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Ep. 1.5: "Ewoks"

You know them, you love them, you thought they were so cute and cuddly that you wanted one as a pet, or maybe a next door neighbor -- but I thought "Star Wars" could have done without those little Ewoks. But then again, I didn't like "District 9" so what do I know?

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Ep. 1.4: "He's a Sumo Wrestler"

To help finance our little Road Trip, we might have to put on costumes and sing a song or two in front of the comvention center. It's very possible!

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Ep. 1.3.5: "Archie"

Have you heard the news about Archie? You haven't? Holy cow, what planet have YOU been living on?

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On The Road is now on iTunes!

Holy Cow, we made it to the "big time." On The Road to Comic-Con is available through iTunes! That means you can download episodes of the show, take them with you wherever you go, and when you're laughing at our corny jokes, people will stop you and ask, "What are ya laughing at?" And you can say, "Just a couple of geeky guys."

What a day!

Ep. 1.3: "Intro Music"

Every up-and-coming show has to have music. And now we got ours.

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Ep. 1.2.5: "Movie Review: District 9"

This is a special episode of On The Road. It's our first audio podcast, and we spend our time reviewing the newest Sci-Fi movie to hit the big screen -- District 9.

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District 9

The only good reason for me to miss Peter Jackson's new movie "District 9" is that I'm dead.

Robert got a haircut!

Now, I don't know if you'll think Robert's haircut is newsworthy material, but it is to the rest of us because it's mighty short. Not marine "high and tight" short, but sorta like bank manager short.

No more shaggy look. Now he's Mr. Clean. It's going to take some time getting used to.

Vampire-Con starts this weekend in Hollywood, CA. I don't think I'll be making it! It's just not something I can sink my teeth into!

Battlefield Earth

If your only exposure to "Battlefield Earth" is through the movie of the same name, then get off your duffus, go to Barnes & Noble or Amazon and order the book. The book is something else; it's a masterpiece in science fiction; and if it's not on your bookshelf by Christmas, put it on your "wish list" and don't settle for anything else.

I've read L. Ron Hubbard's "Battlefield Earth" twice, and when we make our 2010 trip to Comic-Con, it's going to be in my hot little hands.

The book, which is a hefty 1,050 pages long, is about Johnnie "Goodboy" Tyler and his struggle to take back Earth from the aliens who invaded it many years ago. And just when you thought it was a done deal, Hubbard throws in another twist, another turn.

It's a purely science fiction book, and I don't understand why you're still reading THIS when you could be online ordering "Battlefield Earth."

Now, get along with you!

Ep. 1.2 "We have a website?"

"And above all things, never think that you're not good enough yourself. A man should never think that. My belief is that in life people will take you at your own reckoning." -- Isaac Asimov

Ep. 1.1 "The Adventure Begins"

I'm hungry for a burger!

There are not too many things that will get me moving off the couch like a fantastic hamburger! And from what I hear, there are a few burger joints in San Diego that I'm just going to HAVE to try.

In-N-Out will probably be the first burger stop we make when we get to Comic-Con 2010, only because everybody considers it THE burger joint of the west. It may just be a glorified Burger King, but we'll let you know.

Next up? Original Tommy's Hamburgers with 100% beef patties, double-thick slices of real cheese, fresh chopped onions, hand sliced beefsteak tomatoes, pickles and mustard -- with CHILI. Our arteries will be begging for mercy!

How about a stop at Ruby's Diner? The Rubyburger, with 1/3 lb. fresh choice ground beef has been an all-American classic for 25 years! And all of their burgers are served with "Refillable" Fries! Oh, baby! That's the way I like it!

Finally, we'll be sure to stop off at Rocky's Crown Pub, where you get a burger with a local pub atmosphere. The only items on the menu are burgers and fries, with or without cheese (American or swiss) -- and beer!

Yes indeed! The summer of 2010 is going to be a Burger Fest on our Road to Comic-Con!

Tim Burton's "Alice in Wonderland"

"Anything you dream is fiction, and anything you accomplish is science. The whole history of mankind is nothing but science fiction." -- Ray Bradbury

Let's get Skiffy!

Skiffy is a deliberate humorous misspelling or mispronunciation of the controversial term "sci-fi", which is short for science fiction.

So why is there such a big controversy? Well, "sci-fi" brings up images of bad monster movies, whereas "science fiction" or just plain "SF" brings up images of respectability and tweed jackets. And who doesn't want to be respected for what they enjoy?

We don't! We're happy no matter what. So stop your complaining, and Let's Get Skiffy!

On The Road to Comic-Con!

Welcome to the podcast home of "On The Road to Comic-Con."

This will be our first trip to Comic-Con, which begs the question: Do we know what we're in for? Will we be able to overcome our differences to survive an all-out geeky week together? Do we even know how to get to San Diego?

Stay tuned and watch as we prepare for the geekiest road trip of all time!